Teaching virtues - Gratitude

Some of you will be familiar with The Family Virtues Guide (www.virtuesproject.org) which is a fantastic resource for teaching and learning good behaviour.

In the Virtues Guide the authors take you through a series of 'virtues' - good behaviour such as kindness, helpfulness, obedience, truthfulness and generosity - and give practical tips for how to teach these. There are 52 virtues included. If you are able to practice one virtue per week as a family then both parents and children can learn to re-shape their behaviour. There is nothing like trying to teach good behaviour to your children to help you improve your own conduct!

At the moment our 4 year old daughter is struggling to show gratitude for all the good things that happen in her life. For example, every day when she asks what will be for dinner, she responds with 'I don't like that' even when it is one of her favourite meals. Or, if we have had a lovely day out with lots of treats she will complain about the one thing she didn't have.

I'm sure this is all normal and no big deal, but I would still like to have the right approach to encouraging her to be more grateful. How can I teach her to appreciate what she has?

The Virtues Guide includes 'thankfulness' which speaks directly of gratitude. That section opens with the following explanation:

"Thankfulness is being grateful for what you have. It is an attitude of gratitude for learning, loving and being. Thankfulness is being glad for the special things which come along. It is also being grateful for the little things which happen around you and within you every day."

There are discussion questions to help you understand the topic, and a checklist to see how you are doing.

The virtues are taken from the positive behaviours encouraged by the major religions of the world. They acknowledge the role of a Creator in our lives.

So, my plan for this week is to prepare a little session for our family in which we look at the virtue of thankfulness and see how we can practice this in our lives. If you have any stories / games / colouring sheets / suggestions on this topic then please let me know!

Cute sleeping baby!

OK so this one is for family & friends, plus anyone out there who likes cute babies!

Harrison at 8 months old enjoying his new car seat :-)

Emma-Jane Maternity & Nursing Bra

This is one of the top selling products for our maternity clothes business - Emma-Jane nursing bra style 361.

 It is popular because it is practical, comfy and affordable. Emma-Jane's website states: Our Next Generation seamfree bra is rapidly becoming THE must have maternity and nursing bra. Besides being super comfortable, it gives value three ways: low price, can be used as a maternity or nursing bra, and the cup size adjusts as you grow – no need for multiple size bras

We have now sold several thousand of these bras and have loads of excellent customer feedback. The bra is available in white, black and nude, and in UK sizes 32 to 38. 

I'd love to review this bra from personal use, but unfortunately I'm larger than that size range! So, I can tell you that the quality is excellent, other mums love this bra and often come back for more. It sells for £9.95 plus postage so it is a bargain.

You can buy it from our site here


The bra is made from 90% polyamide and 10% elastane. It fits all cup sizes from B through to F, so it is ideal for nursing as it accommodates your fluctuating size. It is soft with no underwire, and it has clips for nursing.

Tesco clubcard: find your unused vouchers

Tesco are running their double your money voucher exchange at the moment. If you're a regular shopper with Tesco you can use your clubcard vouchers to buy a whole range of different goods. We realised we hadnt received anything from Tesco clubcard in a while, and after checking online found we had £40 worth of un-used vouchers. We were able to print them at home and take them in store to convert to £80 of spending.

We got some great bargains on school clothes ready for September, and will be browsing online for camping equipment. Do you have any unused vouchers?

Can't believe my little girl will be starting school!

National Marine Aquarium in Plymouth

Last weekend we visited the National Marine Aquarium at Plymouth harbour. It was our third visit - you can return for free throughout the year after buying your first ticket. To do this you need to bring a passport photo for each person so check out the terms and conditions on their website before going (http://www.national-aquarium.co.uk). You also get 10% off by booking online, plus much faster entry.

As you can see from the pictures it was a rainy day, and I would highly recommend it as an all weather activity. For each visit we've spent about half a day in the aquarium and then also had a walk around the harbour, by the famous Mayflower steps.

Inside the aquarium is set over several levels with some fantastic deep tanks where you can sit and watch sharks swim past. There are endless educational displays and it is a fascinating day out for all ages. I really have nothing to say on the marine life, so clearly I learned very little :-)

There are lots of activities aimed at small children, and helpful stools for them to climb on to get a better look. Although virtually every family in the place had a pushchair, there are a few parts which are less pushchair friendly as you have to take a lift up and down. The majority of the place is accessed via a sloping walkway making it much easier to get around.

There is a playcentre in the cafe which is immediately in front of you when you arrive. It's a great idea, but can be a bit stressful as it is overcrowded with not enough cafe space for all of the waiting parents. If you can   possibly avoid eating at the aquarium I would. There isnt an obvious indoor picnic space and the cafe is too small and fairly expensive. There are loads of lovely cafes in the nearby harbour.

All in all a great experience. Like most family day trips, it could be expensive if you go once, but if you live in Devon and can repeat the visit then it is great value for money.

Winning the vegetable wars!

A few days ago for the first time, our 4 year old daughter asked for MORE BROCCOLI! This was a momentous and unprecedented occasion. (See previous post ..The vegetable wars)

I'm trying to appreciate victories when they present themselves. For years we have battled to get our daughter to eat even a mouthful of vegetables. It's encouraging to see that our hard work is gradually building a pattern of behaviour and it gives us motivation to keep trying.

Getting the children to eat healthily seems to be an endless task. Our 2 year old is currently ignoring all vegetables on his plate (he love veggie sausages more than anything else) but he will eat fruit at pre-school. Thankfully his pre-school is training him in the art of fruit before yoghurt and they have plenty of will power.

There are still many things I feel endlessly guilty about with my 4 year old: she eats '50/50' bread rather than proper wholemeal, she wont go near a carrot, courgette, pepper, onion, strawberry or any other kind of berry, I allow her quite a few sweet treats when we go out, she has apple juice in between meals (against the advice of the dentist). But, for just a few moments I'm going to savour the sweet taste of success in having raised a child who once asked for extra broccoli.

Money saving tips

Many of us struggle with finances when we have young children. The added cost they bring along with often losing one salary (or going down to part time work) can put a strain on the family budget. So here are a few ideas I've picked up along the way. Thanks to all of the friends who have suggested these tips over the years - I'm not trying to claim them as my own!

1) Can you change your supermarket shop? I thought that I was budget-aware with my weekly shop, but a friend recently recommended shopping at Aldi. I gave it a try and it definitely saved money, but it took a huge amount of time as I was previously getting Tesco to deliver. I tried going to Tesco and looking on the shelves for the budget (Tesco Value) alternatives and discovered I could save between £5 and £20 a week by changing items. So, I'm back to shopping online and having it delivered, but with a few more value brands.

2) Use cloth nappies. We invested around £180 in a full set of Wonderoos cloth nappies when our first child was born, and we are still using them with child number 3. With the 2 older children we switched to disposable nappies when they turned 2 years old as the cloth nappies just weren't absorbent enough, and we also use disposables overnight so that we don't need to change them. But, it has saved us a fortune in buying nappies every week, and is also great for the environment. Many county councils also offer incentive schemes such as money back if you buy cloth nappies.

3) Eat home cooked food. Ok it's an obvious one, but eating fresh food really does make sense. We're trying to get better at taking sandwiches with us on our many outings as the café trips are really adding up. The children and I eat vegetarian food which hopefully saves us a bit as well.

4) Set a realistic spending budget and stick to it. I now have a weekly figure that we can afford to spend, and I'll adjust it based on what's happening. So if a school holiday is coming up I know we'll need to put aside more. Using cash instead of your debit card also really helps to keep track of spending.

5) Look at your last 2-3 months bank statements and see what you are actually spending money on. This is a tough one to motivate yourself to do, but I was surprised at the results. It is easier to face up to your spending patterns if you have the facts in front of you. This definitely helped us create a realistic budget.

6) Shop around for a deal. I'm sure you do this already, but many quality items can be picked up via sites like eBay - new as well as second-hand. We do get our children's feet measured at Clarks and buy their shoes but for second and third pairs of shoes we then look online. Our last trip to Clarks cost £58 for sandals and we realised the shoes our children had been wearing were too small. I couldn't afford to buy them proper shoes as well as sandals so managed to get them second-hand Clarks shoes on eBay.

Having said all of this, we are ALWAYS broke! So, please let me know your money-saving tips!

3 forward facing car seats!

Just a quick photo update today... We got (baby) Harrison a new car seat this week which is forward facing.  He loves it, and is still comfy sleeping. When he is awake he grins happily out of the window. So, our 4 year old is in a booster sit in between her 2 brothers. We have to get her to let the baby sleep and keep the toddler awake!

Haircuts at Nippers in Exeter

I wrote before about the trauma of paying to have my children's hair cut (do you pay for your children's haircuts) and this week I took them to a new place: Nippers in Exeter. I haven't been able to find a functioning website for Nippers but you can easily find their contact details on google.

I knew before going that it was going to cost £9.95 per child, so I viewed it as a (possibly one off) afternoon's outing. The experience was great though, and I could see where the money is going. Nippers is a hairdressers which only serves children and so is set up to be a child-friendly environment. There is a waiting area with toys and all of the salon seats are wooden toys. My daughter sat on a horse and my son sat inside a car. There is a choice of kids DVDs to put on during the haircut to keep them still and happy, and they received a balloon and a few chocolate raisins at the end.

I don't begrudge them the money charged, but I'm not sure I can bring myself to part with that kind of cash on a regular basis. The haircuts were good though, and the children loved the experience.

Camping - what do I need to know?

Our family is facing the first year of school holidays now that our 2 eldest are in pre-school rather than nursery. We just about survived half term and the Easter break, but those 6 long weeks of family time are looming. We'll have to get our work done around the children, but are planning to have 2 (separate) weeks of holiday. Our budget will stretch to a camping holiday here in Devon and Cornwall. We're also planning to go away over the weekend for a one night tester trip to see whether we can survive a baby, a toddler and a pre-schooler under one canvas roof. So, what do I need to know?

Trying out the tent in our garden

We have a 4 man tent kindly donated a few years back by some dear friends, we've gotten a gas cylinder and some special saucepans from my parents, and we've bought a camping stove which has 2 hobs and a grill. We also have some grotty old sleeping bags.

The last time we went camping there was only me, Mark and Alabama who must have been under 2 years old. We had a great time, although we realised that once she was asleep we had to sit in near silence and near darkness for fear of waking her :-)

So... I'd love to hear your top tips and your campsite recommendations. This summer we'd like to visit Dartmouth and St Ives, and for the tester trip we saw a nice cheap campsite near to Kingsbridge which we may try.